There is a better way

I talked about self harm so many times but some people just don´t seem to get the point. They think we are stupid to do such things but the only people I heared this from actually self harmed as well or smoked. So here is the thing about it...they don´t just do it for fun.

I am gonna say "We" because I did it myself even if it is hard to believe. I can say that I recovered but I can´t say that I fully recovered. For me recovery means that I don´t cut every day now. I am happy for that. On the other hand I have to admit that I did cut sometimes after I got out of it because it was too much again. So to the point. We ain´t stupid... if a person cuts then it is because of the stress. You just feel much better after it. It is like crying or smoking. You let out all the stress. Such as you smoke and eat and whatever escape you have.

The other reason to do it is that the person feels bad about himself. Simply disgusted and worthless. And often other people make you feel bad about yourself. They blame you for things you did accidentaly or juSt bully for the way you look or act. You will blame yourself and you will think that you deserve to cut yourself because if people tell you something then it must be true. But it isnt. It isn´t your fault. Some things just aren´t your fault. If you cut yourself because someone bullied you or you hate yourself, family or so please try to to cool off. I know it means nothing in that moment because it is a quick process but when you are okay then hide the things you can cut with and that is a way to protect yourself from yourself. Because when you are going to look for the things you can cut with then you are going to think. And try to think about all the good stuff in your life and that you don´t wannt to go down that road again. There is a better way. I understand that you need to release the stress but try to overcome yourself.

When you self harm very often like every day or every other day you start blaming yourself for every little thing. You make something stupid and you feel bad about yourself. I know that you simply blame yourself for everything and you hate yourself for everyhing you do and everything you are but if you blame yourself for hurting people around you and you didn´t want to do it then please realise that all of us hurt people and we don´t do it on purpose. Just take your time to get back where you should be and apologize. There are great things in this world. Start looking for those.

And now for the people around the self harmers. First of all...they already hate themselves very much so please try not to look at them as they were some monsters and don´t judge because you don´t know what is going on. The mistakes people do are that they tell self harmers that they shouldn´t complain so much about their lives and themselves. I know it seems like nothing to you but you should understand that it IS a mental ilness and they feel really worthless. The other thing is that self harmers tend to act more irritated, sad and angry. In this stage of their lives they might say something ad to you what they are going to regret in the future. The important thng is that they don´t want to hurt you and they think they aren´t good enough even for their own best friends and then they hurt you in order to get rid off their friends, then they regret it. So the best thing you can do is try to forgive because in reality they weren´t themselves. And don´t start questionng everything. Like why did they do it or when, how many times. I feels like you don´t even care about them...just about the condition. And don´t ever tell them to show it because they know that it is there. If they tell you about their problem then they want help and not to be an attraction.

So now how to prevent self harm. Poeple will tell you to paint your nails or go for a walk but let´s get real. You need to break something or tear something up. That will help. Do everything you need to do. Just not on your skin. Believe me.....you don´t want to be that depressed cutter. You don´t want to die. You just do it because you think it won´t get better but in the bottom of your heart you hope it would. Think about all that time you wasted hating yourself, searching skinny photos, depressed qutes. Just a waste I know. Think of all the opportunities you could do. Self harming won´t make you much popular than you are now. It won´t be a beatiful story like the songs you listen to and all the videos you watch. If you want help then go get it. Talk to somebody. But these people often don´t want to talk or to get noticed because they are afraid of the judgement and they think they aren´t worth the careness. But they are. Look around you, you are surrounded by people who love you. I am sure that you have at least one person in your life who is willing to help you, at least one friend. Life isn´t so bad as it seems to be. Get help. Please. "There is a better way." I tell this to myself every time I am about to cut or feel like cutting. You are so much beter than a razor. There is a way to fix things. There is a better way - this sentence saved my life so many times. So much depends on your life. You make somebody elses life different. Poeple need you no matter what you say, no matter how worthless you feel there is a better way and you are needed in this world. When you feel like nobody ever cared about you then imagine a world without you and imagine how they would feel if they lost you. Don´t tell yourself that they wouldn´t even notice because that hurts. I know that we hurt people when we are hurt. We hurt the people around us more than we hurt ourselves. If you don´t want to hurt the people you love, don´t hurt yourself.

So as I said I did self harm myself. Looking back at it I feel stupid. I am not telling you this to poty me or to hear our the next story because there are thousands. I am not trying to pursuade you not to do it because I know it won´t work. I am telling you this because I want to fight against one thinkg. I feel stupid because of self harm but not for doing it. I accepted it because we all make mistakes. I feel stupid and bad because I let myself believe that I actually deserved it, that I wasn´t good enough, that I leet myself pursuade by society that we should feel like we are less than others. Noone deserves to feel like that. Even when we do mistakes we are human. We are intelligent people and even geniuses make mistakes and try more times.We should not let ourselves pursuade by society that we are something else besides what we think of ourselves. You should never change your opinion about yourselves for other people, because of other people, after the actions of other people. There is just one opinion worth changing for or doing anything for really.....and that is YOURS.

#selfharm #lifegetsbetter #hope